Showing posts with label Meshell. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Meshell. Show all posts

We miss Meshell

Meshell was in town a few weeks ago. We miss her a bunch, but a girl has to do what a girl has to do.
A great photo of Meshell and Doug

Check her out at:

Subway Seat for 3

Michelle packed up, left Columbus and got a job in New York City.

She and her two buddies have a website you should check out: You can follow their daily grind and I think there is a shower-cam, too. It seems that in New York, chicks are bothered by douche bags on an hourly basis. Read how Michelle accidentally says yes to a proposal from a hot dog cart guy.

Good luck Michelle!

Things to do at Skully's UPDATE with photos

A few weeks ago, I wrote about the Things to do at Skully’s on Ladies’ 80’s. I’ve got part of the list below and I wanted to share with you how we did that night.

A. Guess the song

There are a limited set of 80’s songs that the DJs at Skully’s play. Initiate the game by leaning forward and yelling the name of the band you think will be played next. Your friend will nod approvingly and name their own band. If you are on that night, guess name of band and song title. You are not allowed to say B-52’s “Love Shack” or you will be escorted out of the bar.

How’d we do? We only played once and it took about 45 minutes for me to win. I think I guessed New Order.

B. Find the meme
Skully’s has it own memes. Look for the following people and check them off as you locate them:
- Damon Zex (local celeb)

Damon was not there that night.

- Terminator Guy (check for the fingerless gloves and sunglasses)

Here he is:

- Old Man (dude is old and scouting for 21 year olds. I’m guessing he was 70 in the 80’s.)

Here is the Old Man

- 80’s chicks (20 somethings who are decked out in 80’s garb)

These two were dressed more 80's punk, but I think the judges will let this one slide.

- First time lesbians (the dance close, they grind, they make out, tomorrow they will laugh.)

Here they are! I don't think they are full time, only part time. Didn’t get the photo of them making out, but believe me! Smoochie smoochie!

- Really desperate drunk guy (tries to dance with every girl in the place, spills his beer on the top of your shoe, makes his way to the stage and foolishly dances with the girl that is really a guy.)

This guy was pretty close. Two beers and a headband? He did a pretty classy job of being "That Guy."

- Girl that is a Guy (Look closely. (S)he’s there.)

Did not see him/her. Sorry.

- Outlanders (The local Goth bar is closed (again) and they need a place to hang

Hello Kitty Girl

C. Where’s is Doug?

In this game, find the fat older guy that looks like me and point him out to the team. Now that I am older, we look for a fat young guy that looked like me. Dave made this game famous one night when I found an old, fat “Doug” and said, “Hey, that’s me in ten years.” Dave looked at the “Doug” and then back at me and said, “Five.”

Here is “Doug in ten five years.” (He's the one on the left, asshole.)

D. Call your friend and leave a message

When one of us can’t be there, the others will wait for a good song to come one and call the left out friend. Hold the phone up and sway. The next morning, left out friend gets a three minute long static bundle with a slurred voice saying, “You missed out.”

I called Acton at some point, but I didn’t hold the phone up in the air.

BONUS! Here was another part of the article about how to prepare/what to do at Skully’s:

8. Drink More
I dance better and you look prettier when I drink more. When you are done with your beer, stick it in your back pocket or under the stage. Don't be an asshole and set your half finished drink on the edge of the stage. Jerks.

Stick Empty Beer in Back Pocket

Stick Empty Beer under the Stage

Empty Beer Other

I like Other better


Terminator Guy and Old Man in the same photo!

Dave standing next to the main stage make out couple

Old man dancing with Goth Girl (look for her at the bottom of the photo) with Dave and other dude giving the thumbs up.

Here is my boss Erik dancing with Michelle.

And here, my friends, is a heart-breaking photo of Jenn, Dave, Doug and Meshell. Dave is moving to Maine next month. Meshell is heading to New York City. Skully's will never, ever be the same.

Last call.

Meshell is Talented

My very good friend Meshell is very talented. Please check out her stuff at this site:

Also, please convince Meshell that she should move to New York or LA or Chicago where her skills would be best utilized. Ohio is no place for talent like hers.

Free to HolyJuan fans! The Power of Soup

Two years ago, I thought that I should write a children’s book, get published and make a shitload of money. So I got together with my illustrator friend Meshell and she showed me her portfolio for inspiration. In her large collection of drawings was an illustration that caught my eye. A woman with a large spoon tucked in her apron. She hugged a large bowl of soup with the words, “Get well soon” floating on the surface.

So I wrote a story based on that illustration called, “The Power of Soup.” My biggest critic, Miss Sally, liked it. I shared it with Meshell and she liked it and said that, if I asked her nicely, she would illustrate the rest of it. I said I would give her the first opportunity, once I secured a publisher.

Together, Meshell and I bought “How to Get Published” books and I sent my properly formatted copies of “The Power of Soup” out to several publishers. I even bought the website,, just to be sure.

Six rejection form letters later, I’m done with the half-dream. Instead, let me share it with you, the people who care for and love me.

So here, my friends, is my story, The Power of Soup. See if you tear up when you read it, like I did when I wrote it.

The Power of Soup

In a very small house with two very small windows, lived a woman. She lived alone, but she was never lonely.

If you were to look through the very small windows, you would see a very small bed, a very small chair, a very small table, a very small lamp, a very small painting and a very big stove.

The woman loved to cook. She had a very big kettle to sit on the very big stove. She had a very big spoon to stir whatever was in the very big kettle. The woman could cook about anything, but she especially loved to cook soup.

Pea soup, bean soup, potato soup, vegetable soup, rhubarb and turnip soup, dandelion soup, and her very special soup which she called Soup Soup.

People would come from the villages near and far to the woman’s house and bring whatever ingredients they had so that she could make her delicious soup for them.

Miss Dryer came to the woman’s door, “I have carrots.”

“Then we will make carrot soup.”

Mr. Hearty came to the door. “I have potatoes.”

“Then we will make potato soup.”

The Simon twins came to the door, “We have turnips and leeks.”

“Then we will make turnip and leek soup.”

Somehow, though only one or two ingredients were added, the woman was able to stir and stir and stir and stir and soon that one ingredient would taste like many!

Everyone loved the woman’s soup.

One day, a little dark haired girl with sad eyes came to the woman’s door. She wore handmade clothes that were more patches than cloth.

“Can you please make me some soup?”

“What have you brought with you to make the soup?” asked the woman, knowing the answer.

“I have nothing. My mother is sick and father is away in the city. I have nothing to make soup.”

The woman said, “Come inside. I think you have something to add to the soup.”

The woman added water to the very large kettle. She lit the very big stove and began to stir.

“Now, little girl, you have nothing in your hands and you have nothing in your pockets, but you have something in your heart. All you need is to speak to the soup and tell it what your heart is saying.”

The little girl stood on a little chair and was just able to look over the edge of the kettle.

She spoke in but a whisper, “I love you Mommy. Get well soon.”

The woman then began to stir and stir and stir and stir.

And as she stirred and stirred the soup began to churn and bubble. Broth began to form and carrots and peas and beans and leeks and hundreds of herbs and vegetables and flavors mixed and melded in the pot. With a final stir, letters formed of pasta bubbled to the surface.


“I love you Mommy.”

…and they sank. Then…

“Get well soon.”

As the sun began to dip in the afternoon and create its own colorful soup in the sky, shadows of a smaller person and a bigger person together carried a very big kettle towards the village.

The next morning, the woman arrived back to her very small house with two very small windows. She carried with her a much emptier pot, a small bouquet of flowers and a very big smile.

As she walked in the door she said to herself, "I think I'll make some soup today."

Doug Dances

The theme for one of the napkin drawing series last night was "Doug Dances." I'll leave it up to you to connect the dots. The top one is mine and the bottom one is Meshell's.

Am I puking a rainbow?

Find the Stuff

See if you can find the stuff in this napkin drawing by Meshell.

The Stuff:
Wine Bottle
Ear of Corn
Buttered Toast
The Finger


I am just now getting over the flu. I’ve never had the flu and I picked a really poor time to have a first go at it. It started around noon on Wednesday. I had the full fever and chills by midnight. I was slightly delirious up though Saturday afternoon when I thought I was getting better, but I was only fooling myself. Saturday night I had the fever again and that ran through Sunday. I went to work today because you cannot get rid of the flu until you give it to someone else. It’s now Monday evening, St. Patrick’s Day, and I am playing the part of the good boy and staying at home to cap this off. It was poor timing because I missed Meshell’s birthday at Skully’s on Thursday, basketball tournaments on Friday, the Saturday night birthday celebration and St. Patrick’s Day all in one fell swoop. Crap.

Thank you Lia. Thank you Meshell.

Over a year ago Lia suggested I start this site. I thought she was nuts.

Soon after the site was up, she suggested I get business cards. I thought she was nuts.

Last night, as a complete surprise, Meshell gave me a box of the HolyJuan business cards we had been designing.

I said, “This is the best gift I’ve had in a year!” Meshell said, “Wasn’t your baby girl born less than a year ago.”

I said, “This is the best gift I’ve had in the past six months!”

You can print these up and hand them out to your friends and/or enemies.

Draw to the right

This is the last Meshell - Shorty - Doug napkin drawing post. I swear. Really!

This was one of the first sketches we did which was to draw the person on your right. I thought it would be interesting to see everyone's perspective from the left side. That's why I drew mine like this:

Of course, I was wrong. Meshell drew Shorty as he looks at others. Other chicks that is.

And Shorty just drew my face. The joke being that my head is too big to fit on a single piece of paper.

Asshole. His head is exactly the same as mine. Too big.

Feel free to e-mail me sketches of yourself. I'll post you along with a 17 word description of who I think you are.

Decisions, decisions

I drew the first sketch. Meshell fleshed it out.

I'm not sure what the sketch was supposed to represent. If this was some kind of Sophie's Choice, I'd have to take out the mouse. And then the cat.

Napkin canvases

Last night, Meshell, Shorty and I got together at B Hamptons to get a drink. During one of Shorty’s five trips outside to talk on the phone (i.e. smoke), Meshell and I started doodling on napkins. When Short got back, he joined in.

Most of what we drew is, well, disgusting if not a crime against good taste.

We ended up playing a game where everyone wrote down a noun and a verb ending with “ing” on their napkin. The napkin was passed to the right and the person would have to draw what was written on the napkin. I think I can show you those without embarassing anyone. (I'm not really sure how Meshell and I both chose to use the word "house" as our noun. Drinking ESP.)

House Stealing - by Short

House Killing - by Meshell

Tit Fucking - by Doug

By the end of the night, we had a huge stack of napkins filled with ink and sin. I shoved them all in my jacket pocket with promises of scanning them all when I got home. On my way to work this morning, I wondered for about five minutes why my jacket wasn't fitting right.

ComFest 2006

I would like to think that this year’s ComFest was supposed to be about music, community and the celebration of diversity. The most entertaining part of it for me was what happened after ComFest while people were leaving and how they interacted with a shopping cart and two hula hoops. Please allow me to present my first photo heavy entry.

Miss Sally, Greg and I drove down to ComFest and I sold what was left of my soul for an awesome parking spot. We loaded Greg and the goods into the little red wagon and rolled into the crowds. Greg got his first sight of hippy and his first smell of weed. We spread out a blanket and listened to music for a few hours. It was a good time. Russ, Cheri and Reed joined us and we all shared grapes, juice and squirt guns.

Reed got to see a spiky, blonde haired lesbian throw up. Greg and I threw a Frisbee with a mentally disabled kid.

Um, at a mentally disabled kid.

Around 8:00pm, Miss Sally had to make water and we did not have the 30 minutes to wait in line at the porta potty. Instead we packed up and wagoned over to my friend Meshell’s house to meet up with some friends. They were all surprised to see Miss Sally’s pregnant belly. (Miss Sally is at best 105 pounds with a wet winter jacket on. The baby has decided to grow straight out and so she only looks pregnant from two angles.) While we were there, Shorty taught my kid how to karate chop an inflatable palm tree.

I took Miss Sally and Greg home and returned to Meshell’s around 10:00pm. I noticed a shopping cart.

“Hey, that’s a shopping cart.”

Earlier in the day, the folks at Meshell’s watched stunned as a man with a broken arm, broken leg and numerous head stitches lurched down the brick paved street with a walker. He and his girlfriend were not making much progress. This dude was a wreck. Someone came by with a shopping cart and offered it up to the guy. With a little careful lifting and tucking, the guy was loaded inside. Girlfriend rumbled him down the street and to ComFest. Hours later they returned, poured the guy out of the cart and headed back the way they came. A true American story of heroism, ingenuity and a guy that got the smoke beat out of him by a baseball bat.

The shopping cart remained a focal point for all those who passed. Some would jump in it and scream. Others would team up and push eachother in circles. Some would just push the empty cart. For something that was obviously stolen, people seemed intent on returning it to its unrightful owners. It never was more than five hula hoops away.

“Hey, those are hula hoops.”

Taresa had brought two hula hoops to Meshell's. They were in use from noon until 2:00am. Taresa was either hooping or helping someone else to hoop all night long. She was really good. Here you can see how good I was. That is until you compare it to these other photos. It only took 8 shots to get one photo that made me look good. The only good thing was that Shorty was as bad as me. We had several hoop offs that consisted of us holding beers and cigarettes while dropping the hoops to the ground at our feet. Repeat. We sucked.

Josh had it going on, though.

Throughout the night, people would random walk up to the hoops and try them out. Others were coaxed in by one of the resident barkers. As the night wore on and beer sales finished at ComFest, many were conned into foolishness with the allure of free beer to anyone who could hula for more than x amount of seconds. (I’m no programmer, but the hula timing went like this: if hula person = chick then x = 3, if hula person = dude then x = 50)

We had one woman drop her top while hula hooping.

We had another without a shirt whose naughty bits were covered by post-its (postits?)and red marker. I think x for her equaled what she had stuck in her mouth three hours earlier.

All in all, a beautiful night. From the guy who couldn’t find his buddy’s house (it was just on the left of the CVS) to the 24+ guys who humped the traffic cones to the dude who actually ran down the street at full speed with a hula hoop around his waist and performed for five minutes straight.

Other photos from ComFest 2006 can be found here:
  • ComFest 2006 photos