Honolulu (HJ) -- Tests that were performed on Rush Limbaugh after he was admitted to a Hawaii hospital for chest pains "found absolutely nothing wrong," the conservative talk show host said Friday. As a matter of fact, doctors found absolutely nothing that resembled a heart. Senior cardiologist Dr. Mark Hudson explained, “While we believe the pain was caused by an arterial spasm, the arteries in Limbaugh do not come from a “heart,” but rather a large, dark mass that resembles a secondary liver. It is lumpy with some fleshy out-shoots that mimic non-functionality of the appendix.”
Limbaugh said his ordeal started Wednesday afternoon, when he began experiencing pain in his upper left chest "like I've never experienced before."
Dr. Hudson shared, “Once in the hospital, we performed an angiogram that revealed no evidence of arterial or coronary disease. We believe this is due to the large amount of bitter bile that is created by the secondary liver.” Dr. Hudson continued, “We believe that this bile is created in Limbaugh’s “heart” and transported throughout his body in a similar fashion as blood is delivered in humans. The bile is then transported to the lungs where it is mixed with an intake of oxygen and then the waste bile is expelled out the mouth.”
The cause of his pain -- which he called "real" -- has not been determined. It is possible that during Rush’s vacation, there was a build-up of bile that could not be released in the normal fashion during his radio program.
He was discharged from the hospital Friday, bile spewing from his mouth as always. "The treatment I received here was the best that the world has to offer," he said. "I don't think there's one thing wrong with the American health care system. It is working just fine. You should all fly to Hawaii and get your treatment here. I can also suggest some great pharmacies in New York, Florida, California and several other states."
Limbaugh's radio show is broadcast on more than 600 stations and is heard by more than 13.5 million listeners each week.
Wisdom from a friend
I sent a buddy of mine a link to a video of Mike Rowe speaking at TED. His reply (which I have slightly edited) was unexpected, but appreciated.
I say I am a (occupation) a lot. That is my job, but in reality I do very little of that. I am a defender, an advocate, cheerleader, a motivator, a negotiator, a diplomat, a lobbyist and all of these things, make me a leader. I do all of these things in support of those who do the work. Mike is a great speaker. Most people don't pay attention to the fact that the people that grease the wheels of the world, are those that have the gift of oration. I would venture to bet that almost all great things and a whole lot of bad deeds, were born of a great speech. And, even more likely, a small quiet conversation around the water cooler. No product was ever sold or mission ever accomplished simply buying the item, but buying the seller. Wow, all that and not one sarcastic comment or joke, sorry.
Thanks for that.
I say I am a (occupation) a lot. That is my job, but in reality I do very little of that. I am a defender, an advocate, cheerleader, a motivator, a negotiator, a diplomat, a lobbyist and all of these things, make me a leader. I do all of these things in support of those who do the work. Mike is a great speaker. Most people don't pay attention to the fact that the people that grease the wheels of the world, are those that have the gift of oration. I would venture to bet that almost all great things and a whole lot of bad deeds, were born of a great speech. And, even more likely, a small quiet conversation around the water cooler. No product was ever sold or mission ever accomplished simply buying the item, but buying the seller. Wow, all that and not one sarcastic comment or joke, sorry.
Thanks for that.
The Known Universe and Muse
Someone set "The Known Universe" video to music from Muse. Greg drew this picture right after watching it. I like the flag on the moon.

Shouldn't there be a rule against this kind of thing?

My buddy Kevin saw this at a Columbus Chipotle store. I assume Chipotle's employees eating free food on the job policy is pretty strict.
Buy.com delivers a black pen
I ordered a twelve pack of markers from Buy.com through Amazon. Actually I think I stole them from Buy.com because they were really expensive oil based markers and they were selling them for less than $.50 each.

When the package showed up, I was amazed that they would ship a pack of 12 markers in such a large box.

What's this?

One pen?

The paperwork seemed to say that this was it. One pen. A few e-mails later I worked it out with Buy.com. They had a miscommunication with Amazon and listed the wrong item. Buy.com refunded the cost of the pen and I didn't have to ship it back to them in their outrageously huge box.

When the package showed up, I was amazed that they would ship a pack of 12 markers in such a large box.

What's this?

One pen?

The paperwork seemed to say that this was it. One pen. A few e-mails later I worked it out with Buy.com. They had a miscommunication with Amazon and listed the wrong item. Buy.com refunded the cost of the pen and I didn't have to ship it back to them in their outrageously huge box.
Employee Must "Wash Hands" (nudge, nudge, wink, wink)
My buddy Dustin found this sign in a Columbus, OH restaurant bathroom:

I think this is secret code for "Don't worry about washing your hands if no customers are around, but if they are in the bathroom, at least run the water for a few seconds and make a good show of it."
You can catch Dustin's website at http://dustincharles.wordpress.com/.

I think this is secret code for "Don't worry about washing your hands if no customers are around, but if they are in the bathroom, at least run the water for a few seconds and make a good show of it."
You can catch Dustin's website at http://dustincharles.wordpress.com/.

Fixing Palin
Did you know that Sarah Palin has a Twitter account? You should check it out because it is quite hilarious. She types with the ferocity of a fourth grade, dyslexic H4X0R.
What's silly is that it doesn't have to be that hard. You don't have to be illegible when condensing down your insanity to fit within the confines of Twitter. The word for doesn't always have to be Tweeted as "4".
I've started used to stay current on a Twitter account called Fixing_Palin where I retype what she Tweets (sometimes pausing to throw up as I do so), fixing her text and making it all fit in 140 characters.
For instance:

or:

I assume that I will keep this up until she fixes her shit or I get bored.
What's silly is that it doesn't have to be that hard. You don't have to be illegible when condensing down your insanity to fit within the confines of Twitter. The word for doesn't always have to be Tweeted as "4".
I
For instance:

or:

I assume that I will keep this up until she fixes her shit or I get bored.
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