Showing posts with label fake dispatch. Show all posts
Showing posts with label fake dispatch. Show all posts

Calendar by BƎCK featuring Fake Dispatch

I write a Twitter account called Fake Dispatch. And there's a cartoonist named BƎCK that will take Tweets and turn them into cartoons/comics. You can see some of his work at this link: . I think he's used about four of my Tweets to make cartoons.

A few weeks ago, BƎCK shared with me that one of my Tweets made his 2014 calendar. He then asked for my address and shipped me a copy for free! Click on any photo to embiggen.
Envelope front and back

The contents! Very nicely wrapped calendar with a postcard

Postcard back
Pink post-it with a message
Front of the calendar
I got to be January! 

Names of all the Tweeters who were in the calendar.

 It was an honor to be included in the calendar and I appreciate BƎCK sending me a copy. I assume the shipping was more than the calendar and so from the dark recesses of my heart I say to you, thanks!

You can check out the calendar and the other months here: You should buy one of these so that BƎCK can continue to make more calendars and ship them to me.

Taco Bell and White Castle Burrito

A few hours ago, Fake Dispatch was extremely hungry and posted the following:

When I got home, I decided, "Why the hell not?" I loaded Greg and Ann into the van and we headed to White Castle.

Thanks to my Reddit Secret Santa, I had a White Castle gift card.
$5.88 and a sack of 8 Sliders later, I ended up at Taco Bell. There I purchased a bean burrito, and chili cheese burrito (I'm sad they don't call it chilito anymore) and a beefy melt burrito.

At home we unloaded the bags.

And unloaded the contents.

I bought two extra White Castles for the kids to eat. Ann was not impressed by the smell.

Greg was in heaven!

I knew that I was going to need to stuff these Castles in the tortilla shells and I didn't know how well they would take the pressure. Instead I took some waxed paper and rolled the Castles up nice and tight.

I took the beefy melt burrito and revealed the OH MY FUCKING GOD IT'S HIDEOUS!

Pro Tip: Don't ever open your Taco Bell.

I inserted the White Castles...

and folded it back up.

I cut it open to reveal the unnatural bond of burger and burrito.

And then I took a bite.

I'm not going to lie to you. It was delicious. It was DELICIOUS! The red sauce and the rice with the soft bread and oniony, steamy burger... it was really tasty.

Greg liked it, too.

Next was the chili cheese burrito.

Ann tried this one.

While she didn't like it, it, too, was really good!

Finally we tried the bean burrito.

Sadly, the bean burrito was not at all good. The fresh onions did not mix well with the steamed onions and there was an onion gang war in my belly.

Overall, White Castle and Taco Bell make an awesome combination. If you have some wax paper and a wife that only threatens to kick you out of the house for stinking up the place (wait until 3:00am) then I suggest you try it!


A conversation on Facebook. He deleted his comments, but I knew he was going to so I took a screen shot.

Click image to see huge-like.

Fake Dispatch in (614) Magazine

I have a Twitter account called Fake Dispatch. Fake Dispatch is actually more popular than HolyJuan and I need to get over that.

Recently, Fake Dispatch was interviewed in a local magazine called (614) Magazine.

Here it is! Click the photo to embiggen.

Fake Dispatch

Fake Dispatch is a semi-irregular posting of all the fake news that Twitter has to offer. If you are tired of the real news posting fake news, then come to the Fake Dispatch to get your fill of the fake news posting fake news. I’m not going to lie to you: I’m going to lie to you.

If I send you a DM with "Thinking of you" in it, it means my Tweet was based on something you said.

If you are mentioned as a cub reporter, it is my way or RTing something you said.

I should have badges for this, but I don't.  I am pretty lazy.

Follow me at @Fake_Dispatch on Twitter!

@Fake_Dispatch… pissing off mostly everyone, one fake headline at a time.

You can contact me at I do not have a lawyer so you cannot sue me.

(@Fake_Dispatch is HolyJuan and HolyJuan is unapologetic.)