Showing posts with label Greg. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Greg. Show all posts
Cheese, Egg and Pancake Sandwich
Greg was hooked on the McGriddle and we couldn't afford his habit. A month in the St. Bernice of the Heathen Springs Rehab got the toxins out of his system, but the boy still craves the carbs and cholesterol.
So now we make the Cheese, Egg and Pancake sandwich. It's cheap, easy and takes less than three minutes.
You'll need:
2 Frozen Pancakes (or one bagel)
Egg
cheese
bowl (soufflé cup for bagels)
non-stick spray
Stack the frozen pancakes and microwave for 55 seconds.
While they are nuking, spray the bowl with non-stick spray. Add one egg in the bowl.
Beat the egg until it reveals the secret hideout.
Remove the pancakes from the microwave. I separate them so they begin to cool.
Nuke the egg for 20 seconds. It will still be a bit runny.
Add a godawful amount of cheese.
Cook for 20 - 25 seconds until the cheese is melted.
Use fork to help slide the melty goodness on to the pancake.
I leave the pancakes apart until Greg saddles up to eat it, otherwise the top pancake traps the heat on the inside and it remains too hot to eat for way too long.
Greg Eats
BONUS!
You can also make an egg and cheese bagel using the same method. Instead of a bowl, use a soufflé dish or otherwise the egg will spillover out the sides of the bagel.
Follow all the same steps except you might want to toast your bagel. The cheese may take a bit longer to melt in the more narrow confines of the soufflé dish.
Pro-Tip: Put 1/2 the bagel insides down on the inside the soufflé dish and turn upside down instead of trying to pull the egg and cheese goodness out.
Flip!
Top it and admire your work.
HolyJuan Eats
SUPER BONUS
Watch the nuclear abomination that is formed when egg, cheese and microwaves meet.
So now we make the Cheese, Egg and Pancake sandwich. It's cheap, easy and takes less than three minutes.
You'll need:
2 Frozen Pancakes (or one bagel)
Egg
cheese
bowl (soufflé cup for bagels)
non-stick spray
Stack the frozen pancakes and microwave for 55 seconds.
While they are nuking, spray the bowl with non-stick spray. Add one egg in the bowl.
Beat the egg until it reveals the secret hideout.
Remove the pancakes from the microwave. I separate them so they begin to cool.
Nuke the egg for 20 seconds. It will still be a bit runny.
Add a godawful amount of cheese.
Cook for 20 - 25 seconds until the cheese is melted.
Use fork to help slide the melty goodness on to the pancake.
I leave the pancakes apart until Greg saddles up to eat it, otherwise the top pancake traps the heat on the inside and it remains too hot to eat for way too long.
Greg Eats
BONUS!
You can also make an egg and cheese bagel using the same method. Instead of a bowl, use a soufflé dish or otherwise the egg will spillover out the sides of the bagel.
Follow all the same steps except you might want to toast your bagel. The cheese may take a bit longer to melt in the more narrow confines of the soufflé dish.
Pro-Tip: Put 1/2 the bagel insides down on the inside the soufflé dish and turn upside down instead of trying to pull the egg and cheese goodness out.
Flip!
Top it and admire your work.
HolyJuan Eats
SUPER BONUS
Watch the nuclear abomination that is formed when egg, cheese and microwaves meet.
Creepy Face
Greg and I were playing around with Mr. Potato Head parts. He took this photo of me. I think I've scarred him. Again.
Greg and Dad sans Dad: Jesus Floats above Hell
Greg is in Kindergarten. Watching that kid learn how to read is one of the most exhilarating experience of my life. Being there as he starts to "get it" and realizing that he'll be smarter than me in less than three years is wild.
Then he brings this home (a few months ago) and completely freaks me out:
Upon looking at the drawing, you can see Jesus prostrate, floating above the fires of Hell. And he's got a smile on his face. Underneath all that is some text in Greg's handwriting. At first glance the words seem to sound out, "Pay By the Fire." This is a technique in Kindergarten they call "inventive spelling." They let the students write sentences, sounding out the words and writing how they think they should be spelled. As backwards as that sounds, it seems like it has been working.
As for Greg and this drawing, we spent $12,000 on therapy and $25,000 on an exorcist. Finally we asked Greg what the drawing was about and he said that he liked playing soccer by the fire. "Play by the fire?" Yes, play by the fire. Now we are spending $300 at the local OU branch campus to teach the boy perspective drawing.
Then he brings this home (a few months ago) and completely freaks me out:
Upon looking at the drawing, you can see Jesus prostrate, floating above the fires of Hell. And he's got a smile on his face. Underneath all that is some text in Greg's handwriting. At first glance the words seem to sound out, "Pay By the Fire." This is a technique in Kindergarten they call "inventive spelling." They let the students write sentences, sounding out the words and writing how they think they should be spelled. As backwards as that sounds, it seems like it has been working.
As for Greg and this drawing, we spent $12,000 on therapy and $25,000 on an exorcist. Finally we asked Greg what the drawing was about and he said that he liked playing soccer by the fire. "Play by the fire?" Yes, play by the fire. Now we are spending $300 at the local OU branch campus to teach the boy perspective drawing.
Greg Eats: Lemon Head - The Face Puckering Memory of Taste
Sadly, Erik was killed during the last Erik Eats segment, so now I'm being forced to use my son as food taste bait. Today on Greg Eats - Lemon Heads!
This type of Lemon Head is the individually wrapped, gumball sized version. Packed with Sourifiticky.
Not exactly round, but when you are filled with such delicious sour essence, it tries to force itself out of its round cage.
He pops it in his mouth. Maybe it's not so bad...
ARGH! IT'S SOUR!!
He's starting to get used to it...
ANOTHER WAVE OF SOUR HITS!!
The sour has overcome him!
He's down, but not out. His conclusion? Lemon Heads are AWESOME!
This type of Lemon Head is the individually wrapped, gumball sized version. Packed with Sourifiticky.
Not exactly round, but when you are filled with such delicious sour essence, it tries to force itself out of its round cage.
He pops it in his mouth. Maybe it's not so bad...
ARGH! IT'S SOUR!!
He's starting to get used to it...
ANOTHER WAVE OF SOUR HITS!!
The sour has overcome him!
He's down, but not out. His conclusion? Lemon Heads are AWESOME!
Greg Draws
Greg drew the picture below at pre-school.
Obviously this is a drawing of a tree with partial greening (a by-product of high acidic soil), a cornfield with two stalks of corn (the rest sold for Ethanol) and a boy with rockets in his hands, flying above it all with poop shooting out of his butt.
It reminded me of weebls-stuff.com cartoon called A Walk in the Woods.
Greg has never seen this cartoon and I'm wondering if I will be thinking about it at his first parent/teacher conference in November.
Obviously this is a drawing of a tree with partial greening (a by-product of high acidic soil), a cornfield with two stalks of corn (the rest sold for Ethanol) and a boy with rockets in his hands, flying above it all with poop shooting out of his butt.
It reminded me of weebls-stuff.com cartoon called A Walk in the Woods.
Greg has never seen this cartoon and I'm wondering if I will be thinking about it at his first parent/teacher conference in November.
You're doing a great joerb
I bought the HomeStar Runner T-shirt three years ago for Greg. The smallest size was way too big for him then, so we packed it away.
Last week, I dug it out of the closet. It fits him perfectly.
Last week, I dug it out of the closet. It fits him perfectly.
The Baby Bird that Flew Away
A few weeks ago, Greg and the neighbor girl happened upon a baby bird that was hopping through the back yard. I had them watch it from a distance and said not to bother it. The bird didn’t look injured and was hopping and then flapping it wings. It seemed like it was a day or two away from flying if the cats didn’t find it.
Lunch was served and we went inside, the bird forgotten.
Mom left to run some errands and Greg and I stayed home. I was vacuuming the living room when I noticed Greg trying to get into the doors leading from the deck. It takes him two hands to get the door open and one of his hands was occupied with holding an orange, plastic beach bucket. So without both hands, he was just yanking on the door handle, yelling at me though the glass. With various hand gestures and yells back and forth, I finally gave in and ended up turning off the vacuum and opening the door for him, warning him not to bring in a bucket that was probably filled with dirt and worms.
He said, “The baby bird is sick,” and showed me the contents of the bucket. It contained one, very dead baby bird.
I said, “Greg, this bird is pretty sick. I don’t think he is going to make it.”
Greg looked very sad. I immediately said, “You know what… I’ll give him a drink of water and put him in the front yard in the shade. Maybe he will feel better.” Greg agreed with my medical assessment and treatment. I sent him on his way to the back yard.
I gave the bird a little water and put him and his bucket in the shade in the front yard.
A few hours later, Greg happened upon the orange bucket.
Greg came running in with the bucket and said, “Dad! The bucket is empty! The bird flew away.”
And I said, “He must have felt better and flew off!”
I sent Greg back outside to rinse out the bucket with the garden hose.
Lunch was served and we went inside, the bird forgotten.
Mom left to run some errands and Greg and I stayed home. I was vacuuming the living room when I noticed Greg trying to get into the doors leading from the deck. It takes him two hands to get the door open and one of his hands was occupied with holding an orange, plastic beach bucket. So without both hands, he was just yanking on the door handle, yelling at me though the glass. With various hand gestures and yells back and forth, I finally gave in and ended up turning off the vacuum and opening the door for him, warning him not to bring in a bucket that was probably filled with dirt and worms.
He said, “The baby bird is sick,” and showed me the contents of the bucket. It contained one, very dead baby bird.
I said, “Greg, this bird is pretty sick. I don’t think he is going to make it.”
Greg looked very sad. I immediately said, “You know what… I’ll give him a drink of water and put him in the front yard in the shade. Maybe he will feel better.” Greg agreed with my medical assessment and treatment. I sent him on his way to the back yard.
I gave the bird a little water and put him and his bucket in the shade in the front yard.
A few hours later, Greg happened upon the orange bucket.
Greg came running in with the bucket and said, “Dad! The bucket is empty! The bird flew away.”
And I said, “He must have felt better and flew off!”
I sent Greg back outside to rinse out the bucket with the garden hose.
"Stay Out Daddy"
My five year old was ticked off at me and decided that he wanted a sign on his bedroom door saying, "Stay Out Daddy."
I obliged and got him some paper, a pen, and tape. To help him out further, I wrote down the words on a piece of paper so that he could copy them on the sign. Here is my helpful note:
Here is his sign:
I sometimes try to look back at my childhood and figure out where things went wrong. Greg will only have to check the internet.
{Author’s Note: I highly suggest reading the comments below.}
I obliged and got him some paper, a pen, and tape. To help him out further, I wrote down the words on a piece of paper so that he could copy them on the sign. Here is my helpful note:
Here is his sign:
I sometimes try to look back at my childhood and figure out where things went wrong. Greg will only have to check the internet.
{Author’s Note: I highly suggest reading the comments below.}
Right Between the Legs
What started out as a hair-pulling, bout of shyness, turned into a heart warming, half-hour of son induced inspiration.
We arrived at Greg's soccer practice and the kids were paired up to kick the ball back and forth. Greg refused and mentally wrapped himself around my leg.
I did not beg nor did I bribe, as Miss Sally has taught me the way. I did almost lose it, but in the end I somehow got him to start interacting with the other kids.
And then he did great. This photo is of Greg kicking the ball between the legs of the coach's assistant.
I am a proud papa.
Now, let's see what happens at tomorrow's practice.
What happens after you eat a whole box of Boo Berry?
The kid flew around the house for about twenty minutes. The wife said his arms would give out, but they never did. We finally got a broom and trapped him in a corner. He pooped blue for three days.
How much money do you have?
Greg brought me a Star Wars product catalog and started pointing out all the things he wanted. It would have been quicker for him to show me the things he did not want.
I said, “How much money do you have?”
He said, “More than a lot.”
I am going to use that phrase as much as possible.
I said, “How much money do you have?”
He said, “More than a lot.”
I am going to use that phrase as much as possible.
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