It is not very hard to believe that Skully's Music Diner has been hosting the ghost of Mean Mr. Mustards in the form of Ladies 80's Night since 2001. We started going to Ladies 80’s night on Thursdays in the 2nd year and have been pretty faithful ever since. It used to be that we’d go twice a month. Then once a month. Then once every two months. Now it's twice a year. But we still go.
Dave and Freckled Jenn and I always try to go together. Sometimes other friends will go. Sometimes it’s just Dave and I. Sometime I go alone, but that is another tale.
Here is our Thursday night routine:
0. Dress
I wrote all the stuff below first and realized I left out “dress” so I stuffed it up here as “0.” I hope you don’t mind. Skully’s is for dancing and that means comfortable shoes. I suggest Converse or a pair of sneakers that you don’t mind have spilled beer on the top and unknown sticky stuff on the bottom. You don’t have to wear 80’s clothes, but it doesn’t hurt. I usually wear something Homestar Runner.
1. Pre-drinks
Meet somewhere else and have some warm up beers. Sometimes we play darts. Sometimes we eat a snack. Sometimes we just vent and drink. Usually we try to find a bar that is close to the Short North so that we can convince our friends to join us once the short venture over.
2. Hem and Haw
Sometimes we aren’t exactly sure if we are going to go to Skully’s. We attempt to trick ourselves into thinking that we have families and jobs and that we shouldn't be out until early morning. Then we give in. We usually wait until about 11:00pm to head over. Midnight can come creeping up pretty quickly and we’ll stare across the table / down the bar from each other and ask, “Well? Do you want to go?” Sometimes one of us will just say, “Let’s go,” and we do. Sadly, sometimes we do just go home. But not this Thursday.
3. Park
There are several very close and secret places to park, but I’m not about to give those away. I suggest having Two-sack drive you so that you don’t have to drive yourself home.
4. Meet
Wait for everyone to arrive by the front bar. First one in buys a round of Miller Lite, the Skully’s beer of choice. When you get a tab, you need to give them your credit card and license. Don't act like a chump and question them on this. They give you a number that you show them every time you order a drink (which better be a lot.)
5. Scout
Check out the lay of the land in the front. See anyone you know? No you don’t, because they are at home with their spouses and kids. Walk to the back and see what kind of a night it is going to be. If it is 10:00pm and not crowded, do not fret.
6. Location Location Location
We have a spot on the dance floor. Our spot is to the left of the stage, five feet back and ten feet in from the wall. It’s close to a trash can and near to the patio exit. We also have an excellent view of the stage area where the magic happens.
7. Dance
I have two dances: hands up and hands down. I also spin a lot, especially during “If You Leave" by OMD or “Just Like Heaven” by The Cure.
8. Drink More
I dance better and you look prettier when I drink more. When you are done with your beer, stick it in your back pocket or under the stage. Don't be an asshole and set your half finished drink on the edge of the stage. Jerks.
9. Dance More and if not, Smoke
Keep dancing. When a crappy song comes on, walk out back and take a breather on the patio. The patio is good for smoking and people watching. I do a little of both.
10. Rinse and Repeat
Keep going until they kick you out around 2:15am. If you have a meeting the next day, it’s best to leave early at 2:10am so you can get some sleep. I have learned, to my utter sorrow, that I can no longer function the next day after a Skully’s night.
While you are at Skully’s on 80’s ladies night, there are several things that we do to pass the time. Some are obnoxious. Some are just plain stupid. We love them all.
A. Guess the song
There are a limited set of 80’s songs that the DJs at Skully’s play. Initiate the game by leaning forward and yelling the name of the band you think will be played next. Your friend will nod approvingly and name their own band. If you are on that night, guess name of band and song title. You are not allowed to say B-52’s “Love Shack” or you will be escorted out of the bar.
B. Find the meme
Skully’s has it own memes. Look for the following people and check them off as you locate them:
- Damon Zex (local celeb)
- Terminator Guy (check for the fingerless gloves and sunglasses)
- Old Man (dude is old and scouting for 21 year olds. I’m guessing he was 70 in the 80’s.)
- 80’s chicks (20 somethings who are decked out in 80’s garb)
- First time lesbians (the dance close, they grind, they make out, tomorrow they will laugh.)
- Really desperate drunk guy (tries to dance with every girl in the place, spills his beer on the top of your shoe, makes his way to the stage and foolishly dances with the girl that is really a guy.)
- Girl that is a Guy (Look closely. (S)he’s there.)
- Outlanders (The local Goth bar is closed (again) and they need a place to hang
C. Where’s the Doug?
In this game, find the fat older guy that looks like me and point him out to the team. Now that I am older, we look for a fat young guy that looked like me. Dave made this game famous one night when I found an old, fat “Doug” and said, “Hey, that’s me in ten years.” Dave looked at the “Doug” and then back at me and said, “Five.”
D. Call your friend and leave a message
When one of us can’t be there, the others will wait for a good song to come one and call the left out friend. Hold the phone up and sway. The next morning, left out friend gets a three minute long static bundle with a slurred voice saying, “You missed out.”
Don’t miss out. See you at Skully’s, this Thursday night around 11 or midnight. We’ll be in our spot.
Showing posts with label Skully's. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Skully's. Show all posts
Margot and the Nuclear So and So’s in Columbus
I could not be happier. Margot and the Nuclear So and So’s will be in Columbus at Skully’s Music Diner on October 19th.
Tickets are $10 pre-sale. I bought four of them. Miss Sally and I are going. I’m sure Acton will join in.
Anyone else interested?
Tickets are $10 pre-sale. I bought four of them. Miss Sally and I are going. I’m sure Acton will join in.
Anyone else interested?
You're moving from LA to where?
{Author's Note: This has been updated as of 12/18/07 5-5-09... many a few things a lot of stuff has changed.}
Dear Amber,
My friend Lacey shared with me that youare moving have moved from Los Angeles to Columbus, OH. (I put OH after Columbus as we are not cool enough just to be known as just Columbus.) I do not know why Lacey would suggest me as your virtual tour guide except that once I gave her directions on how to get to the Columbus Zoo. She ended up in OrlandoLos Angeles so I’m not sure what that says about me.
There are only two reasons to move to Columbus: love or lust. You are from LA so I can only assume you are a Scientologist on a secret mission to find out what makes the Eastern Mid-Westerns tick. We have three motivations in Columbus: food, drink and fun. I have asked my friends to help me compile a list of places to go and things to do in Columbus. I had to ask my friends because all I know about Columbus involves drinking and I’d like to think there is more to this town than the bottom of a bottle.
I’m not good at categorizing so I’ll just roll with it:
Food
Columbus actually has really good food. When you get off the plane or when you are pulled over for speeding as you drive into the city limits, take note of all the fat and happy people. So, here are some good eatins:
If you like Mexican, margaritas and patio dining:
Estradas
Great for people watching and if you drink enough, great for people to watch you. Estradas has closed, but has re-opened as the NEW B-Hamptons. See BARS.
If you like awesome raw fish:
Restaurant Japan
Authentic Japanese atmosphere without the drunken business men.
**AUTHORS NOTE** Sadly, Restaurant Japan is closed and has been replaced by Sher-E-Punjab Indian. They do not have raw fish and I have to assume that they cook their food.
As a replacement, let me suggest the Tropical Bistro. Columbus used to be home to an unbelievable Tiki Restaurant called The Kahiki. Somebody must have worn the bad luck necklace from the Brady Bunch into it because it was closed down and replaced by a CVS. The Kahiki was stripped and all the decorative goodies were lovingly stored in a warehouse. Six years later, a tornado passed through the warehouse, gathered up the scenic elements and into a strip mall where the decorations were randomly stuck to the walls of an old Chinese carryout. They then decided to open up a bistro there. The Tropical Bistro has one of the chef's from the Kahiki and a couple of the bartenders as well. It's not the Kahiki, but when your are thirsty, you’ll drink about anything. They still make the best Suffering Bastard. CLOSED
If you like raw fish and hanging out with people who think you have to pay a lot to eat raw fish:
Haiku Poetic Food & Art (Restaurant)
You order sushi
Gucci bag and Prada shoes
We don’t take checks here
If you like sushi and karaoke (which is actually authentic Japanese atmosphere)
Otani Restaurant & Sushi Bar
They have a sushi buffet for lunch and that scares the bejesus out of me.
If you like both Germans and German food:
Schmidt's Restaurant und Sausage Haus
Hmmmmmm… sausage! I suggest brining along an extra pair of Gludaclowsen so that you don’t have to worry about splitting your wunderflutag and exposing your heidegraben.
Here are some other suggestions that I would write about except that I’ve been kicked out of two and cannot pronounce the third without coughing up phlegm:
Milo’s Deli
Spagio
Claddagh Irish Pub
Things To Do While Sober
This one was very tough for me. Luckily I had a number of friends who actually do things with their families outside of happy hour.
Parks
Inniswood Metro Garden
(This is word for word what Erik suggested) It’s a nice place to go with your family or take a romantic walk with your friend’s wife. It’s easy to navigate and lots to see. The last time I was there I saw a turtle, two snakes, and at least a half dozen frogs. They have a small nature preserve, nice gardens and some ponds, with interactives and signage for kids.
Highbanks Metro Park
They have a butterfly and hummingbird garden! If you have a cat and a cat leash you can take it on one of their three pet friendly paths. If you don't have a cat leash, thank God... I was worried there for a minute.
Bike Paths
I hear tell that bike riding can be a fun, invigorating, family building activity. I’ve listed the web site of the bike paths in Central Ohio so that we can both check it out.
Movies
The Drexel
The Drexel plays movies that make Al Gore cry. They also have a problem with their projectors as some films are black and white. Luckily, they run the words at the bottom of the screen.
The Arena Grand
The Arena Grand movie complex has big, comfy, red leather seats. Not sure if that is for comfort or easy clean up. I hear it is a great place for a first date except that the seats are too far apart for a clean “yawn, stretch and reach to arm over the shoulder” trick.
Things To Do While Not Sober
There are a lot of places to drink in Columbus. We’ve got ritzy places and we’ve got dive bars. We got places where a 24 year old idiot will hit on you, other places where a 42 year old idiot will hit on you and a few that I don’t go to. Here are a few of my favorite spots:
The R Bar (North of Campus and in the Arena District)
{The R Bar is now closed... I weep and weep again. This is the bar where we went to see the Small-of-the-Back-Girl and to go to Phase 3 and to cry when we all gotlaid off from COSI. Well, shit....}
B-Hamptons (awesome happy hour and good looking clientel)
I wept when I got the news. B Hamptons has been re-born as Hampton's on King
Thurman Café (eat while you drink; try one of their world famous burgers)
Brazenhead Irish Pub (several locations, several beers on tap, several good looking people drinking at all hours of the day)
Char Bar (Check out the haunted piano in the basement. Use the chalkboards in the bathrooms to make fun of your friends.)
Byrne's Pub (Good music and Granddad’s pizza next door. Don’t ask for Guinness in a pitcher.)
The Round Bar (Look for the bartender who uses a scrunchie to flirt with the clientèle.) A fucking shame.
Dance
Skully's
I must implore you to check out Skully’s 80’s dance night. We usually get drinks at one of the above mentioned locations until 10:30pm and then head over to Skully’s. Ladies get in free and dudes pay $4. We have had some really great times at Skully’s. At least that’s what it looks like in the photos that are e-mailed to me the next day.
Outland
Wear black. Take a friend. Hopefully with re-open.
I hope this list helps. There are a ton of things I left out. My suggestion to you is that you look for The Other Paper. It’s a free, weekly newspaper, published on Thursday that lists all the concerts, venues, bars and events happening in Columbus for that week. Dave tells me there are some interesting personal ads in the back. Lacey and I actually had our photo posted in the Other Paper once. Check it out!
Good luck. Columbus is surprisingly a great place to live. And drink. {Author's note: And drink more.}
Dear Amber,
My friend Lacey shared with me that you
There are only two reasons to move to Columbus: love or lust. You are from LA so I can only assume you are a Scientologist on a secret mission to find out what makes the Eastern Mid-Westerns tick. We have three motivations in Columbus: food, drink and fun. I have asked my friends to help me compile a list of places to go and things to do in Columbus. I had to ask my friends because all I know about Columbus involves drinking and I’d like to think there is more to this town than the bottom of a bottle.
I’m not good at categorizing so I’ll just roll with it:
Food
Columbus actually has really good food. When you get off the plane or when you are pulled over for speeding as you drive into the city limits, take note of all the fat and happy people. So, here are some good eatins:
Estradas
Great for people watching and if you drink enough, great for people to watch you.
If you like awesome raw fish:
Restaurant Japan
Authentic Japanese atmosphere without the drunken business men.
**AUTHORS NOTE** Sadly, Restaurant Japan is closed and has been replaced by Sher-E-Punjab Indian. They do not have raw fish and I have to assume that they cook their food.
If you like raw fish and hanging out with people who think you have to pay a lot to eat raw fish:
Haiku Poetic Food & Art (Restaurant)
You order sushi
Gucci bag and Prada shoes
We don’t take checks here
If you like sushi and karaoke (which is actually authentic Japanese atmosphere)
Otani Restaurant & Sushi Bar
They have a sushi buffet for lunch and that scares the bejesus out of me.
If you like both Germans and German food:
Schmidt's Restaurant und Sausage Haus
Hmmmmmm… sausage! I suggest brining along an extra pair of Gludaclowsen so that you don’t have to worry about splitting your wunderflutag and exposing your heidegraben.
Here are some other suggestions that I would write about except that I’ve been kicked out of two and cannot pronounce the third without coughing up phlegm:
Milo’s Deli
Spagio
Claddagh Irish Pub
Things To Do While Sober
This one was very tough for me. Luckily I had a number of friends who actually do things with their families outside of happy hour.
Parks
Inniswood Metro Garden
(This is word for word what Erik suggested) It’s a nice place to go with your family or take a romantic walk with your friend’s wife. It’s easy to navigate and lots to see. The last time I was there I saw a turtle, two snakes, and at least a half dozen frogs. They have a small nature preserve, nice gardens and some ponds, with interactives and signage for kids.
Highbanks Metro Park
They have a butterfly and hummingbird garden! If you have a cat and a cat leash you can take it on one of their three pet friendly paths. If you don't have a cat leash, thank God... I was worried there for a minute.
Bike Paths
I hear tell that bike riding can be a fun, invigorating, family building activity. I’ve listed the web site of the bike paths in Central Ohio so that we can both check it out.
Movies
The Drexel
The Drexel plays movies that make Al Gore cry. They also have a problem with their projectors as some films are black and white. Luckily, they run the words at the bottom of the screen.
The Arena Grand
The Arena Grand movie complex has big, comfy, red leather seats. Not sure if that is for comfort or easy clean up. I hear it is a great place for a first date except that the seats are too far apart for a clean “yawn, stretch and reach to arm over the shoulder” trick.
Things To Do While Not Sober
There are a lot of places to drink in Columbus. We’ve got ritzy places and we’ve got dive bars. We got places where a 24 year old idiot will hit on you, other places where a 42 year old idiot will hit on you and a few that I don’t go to. Here are a few of my favorite spots:
{The R Bar is now closed... I weep and weep again. This is the bar where we went to see the Small-of-the-Back-Girl and to go to Phase 3 and to cry when we all got
I wept when I got the news.
Thurman Café (eat while you drink; try one of their world famous burgers)
Brazenhead Irish Pub (several locations, several beers on tap, several good looking people drinking at all hours of the day)
Char Bar (Check out the haunted piano in the basement. Use the chalkboards in the bathrooms to make fun of your friends.)
Byrne's Pub (Good music and Granddad’s pizza next door. Don’t ask for Guinness in a pitcher.)
Dance
Skully's
I must implore you to check out Skully’s 80’s dance night. We usually get drinks at one of the above mentioned locations until 10:30pm and then head over to Skully’s. Ladies get in free and dudes pay $4. We have had some really great times at Skully’s. At least that’s what it looks like in the photos that are e-mailed to me the next day.
Wear black. Take a friend.
I hope this list helps. There are a ton of things I left out. My suggestion to you is that you look for The Other Paper. It’s a free, weekly newspaper, published on Thursday that lists all the concerts, venues, bars and events happening in Columbus for that week. Dave tells me there are some interesting personal ads in the back. Lacey and I actually had our photo posted in the Other Paper once. Check it out!
Good luck. Columbus is surprisingly a great place to live. And drink. {Author's note: And drink more.}
Mistake
I think I made a mistake by giving my co-workers my blog site address. I had to share the video our boss made. It was easier to give them this address than search through the 12,328 hits for Santa and Letter on YouTube.
Now they will know when I've been out (last night,) what I was doing (drinking, darts and Skully's) and that I will be late into the office due to something besides the malaria I've contracted 16 times this year.
What that does give me is the opportunity to communicate to the office without having to use that pesky e-mail technology.
Hey Team,
Please let Lori know that I will be in by 10:00am. The malaria medicine is kicking in. Where are we going for lunch today?
Thanks,
Doug
Now they will know when I've been out (last night,) what I was doing (drinking, darts and Skully's) and that I will be late into the office due to something besides the malaria I've contracted 16 times this year.
What that does give me is the opportunity to communicate to the office without having to use that pesky e-mail technology.
Hey Team,
Please let Lori know that I will be in by 10:00am. The malaria medicine is kicking in. Where are we going for lunch today?
Thanks,
Doug
Thanks!
This message is to the girl who was at Skully's last night, dancing around in your bra. You danced for a bit, but were so drunk, you fell flat on your face and had to be carried off.
Thanks. That was hot.
Thanks. That was hot.
I did not go to Skully's last night.
I did not go to Skully's last night. I told Miss Sally that I wasn't going to go to Skully's. I told my co-workers that I wasn't going. I told my friends I wasn't going.
So, I ran into Freckled Jen at Skully's last night. (She also told me she wasn't going to Skully's.) She was with her friend Tracy. Tracy is upset with me because during an argument a few days ago, I got tired of her talking so I made a fist and made my hand talk by moving my thumb up and down. My hand said something like this, "All I hear you say is blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah." I kind of moved my puppet closer and closer to her face with each "blah."
She didn't like that.
So when I saw her last night, I immediately apologized because I have low self esteem and can't stand to have people dislike me. She said she would think about accepting my apology.
So now it’s noon. I've been at work for 1/2 hour. Shorty is going to Sam's Club to buy some 1/4 pound kosher hot dogs.
Things are looking up.
So, I ran into Freckled Jen at Skully's last night. (She also told me she wasn't going to Skully's.) She was with her friend Tracy. Tracy is upset with me because during an argument a few days ago, I got tired of her talking so I made a fist and made my hand talk by moving my thumb up and down. My hand said something like this, "All I hear you say is blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah." I kind of moved my puppet closer and closer to her face with each "blah."
She didn't like that.
So when I saw her last night, I immediately apologized because I have low self esteem and can't stand to have people dislike me. She said she would think about accepting my apology.
So now it’s noon. I've been at work for 1/2 hour. Shorty is going to Sam's Club to buy some 1/4 pound kosher hot dogs.
Things are looking up.
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