HolyJuan

Banzi slide is small or GREG IS HUGE

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Greg had a great day at baseball, winning the coveted game ball. Afterwards we went to Toy R Us so that he could use his money to buy some ...
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Subway's 1st Grade Assignment

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My son, Greg, brought home his visualization assignment from 1st grade. He did pretty good: Accidentally stuck to his assignment was his cl...
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Towel Day is May 25th

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Help to honor the life of Douglas Adams by celebrating Towel Day . Here are some things you can do with your towel: carry small stuff drag ...
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Super Desserts

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Love this: Funeral Super Desserts - Funeral from Ohio Sessions on Vimeo . What are you still doing here? Go listen to more of their stuff...
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Silky

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I'm not sure you remember this, but at one time in your life, you were a virgin. And then all of a sudden, you weren't. For girls,...
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Best Photo from the Surprise Birthday Party

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Love you Jenn and Two-Sack for pulling this one off:

Sarah Palin Begins to Interview Potential Presidential Candidates to Run with in 2012

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COLUMBUS (HJ ) - Many guessed that Ex-Governor Sarah Palin would run in 2012, but all that was speculation until today. Sarah Palin announc...

Choose Your Major

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Albino Squirrel

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Tether

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I assume that this is not the correct way to do this:

National Prayer Day

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Are you a douche?

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Are you a douche? Let's find out! Question 1: Were you at the My Morning Jacket show in Columbus, OH on May 2nd? Question 2: Did yo...
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What happens inside a mobile document shredding truck?

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My Top 10 (plus) Movies

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I like movies. I have, as most of you do, a Top 10 list of favorite movies. The best part of a Top 10 List of Movies is making it and I ha...
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Ten things not to say to your IT guy

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I'm not an IT person (you know, the desktop support guy, system admin or the computer dude,) but I have hired them, had them fix my mist...
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Fake Dispatch

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Fake Dispatch is a semi-irregular posting of all the fake news that Twitter has to offer. If you are tired of the real news posting fake ne...

A page from Bush's memoir "Decision Points"

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How to Write an Obituary for a Child

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While I am usually irreverent, rude and cynical, I think I can help in putting together words that celebrate a child's life. I assume y...

New and Improved... Egg?

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This kind of weirds me out a bit. First off, it worries me when something like chicken eggs that have been around for a few thousand years ...
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God and Scientific Method

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Nom

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I am sad because one of the happiest things on the internet has stolen something from me. Nom. You’ve read it, seen it in cartoons and on p...
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Delicious Urinal Mat

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We recently got new urinal mats in the men's bathrooms at work. For the ladies who are unaware, urinal mats are flat, little plastic ma...
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A Chat Between Smiley and HolyJuan

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My buddy Dave and I both use a program called Steam to access games on our PCs. Part of the Steam program is an instant messaging service s...

A Trade for Idiocracy

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My friends have been raving about the movie Idiocracy for years and yet I have not taken the effort to acquire it. Erik from Erik Eats sugg...

A Page from Sarah Palin's Rider

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Sarah Palin's top secret rider was recently found in a trash can outside of California State University Stanislaus. A rider is part of ...
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Productivity

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After being gone for a week, I found this little diagram in our work area: I could be wrong, but what I think this chart is explaining is th...
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Switcheroo Name

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Here is how you play the game: switch the first letters of your first and last name (for me it would be Joly Haun.) The new name will fall...
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Greg and the Sitting Missile

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Found this while cleaning up some folders. Still funny today.

Sad Easter Bunny is Sad

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Don't be sad Easter Bunny! Jesus is going to come back real soon! You'll see! Photo courtesy of Meshell .
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Yay! Pollen!

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We went to Georgia to visit our relatives this past week. Great time! Our van got a heavy coating of Georgia's famous tree sperm. Our...

E.T. in a lava lamp

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We fired up Greg's lava lamp before bed and this emerged. It looks a lot alike an E.T. preserved in a jar: With flash. Without flash.

What is the rabbit measuring?

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This scan is from Rosemary Wells' "Timothy Goes to School." My son asked me, "What is the rabbit measuring?" I said...
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Reverse Psychology

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Please DO NOT comment on this post about reverse psychology. Thank you.
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Just prop her up for the photo, then we can bury her

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We order packing supplies from Uline. They are a good company and if you order enough, they give you free crap that you would never buy on ...
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Shower Curtain Practical Joke (NSFW)

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(CAUTION: This post is not safe for work, small children and most of the Middle East.) Kim and Shorty held their mostly annual Christmas par...
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Automobile Driving Pledge

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Read this pledge. Agree to it by signing your name in the comments. Print out the Driving Pledge Membership Card. If you get pulled over,...
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Did you see how Discovery Channel will pay for Palin's new show?

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My Guess - Opera Mini

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I tired to guess December 31, 2999 at 23:59:59 but it defaulted to January 19th, 2039 3:14:07. I wonder why that date is special.
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Rejected

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Sadly, GQ rejected me in 2009 for their next year's calendar. They finally sent my photo back: It took me about half an hour to get dow...
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Math Problem is a Problem

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Can anyone help me with this 1st grade level math problem?
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How Long is Your Finger?

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My co-worker, Levi, decided to not deal with the hassle of carrying around a 3 inch ruler, so he had one tattooed on his finger. I'm su...

Eating an Eagle

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A man is brought before the judge. He was found by park rangers, in the middle of the forest, eating a bald eagle. The judge said, "B...

Census Letter

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Did you get the Census letter about the pamphlet about the postcard?
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Getting it out of the way

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Normally, my 1st grader has one word family word each week (words with the same ending like big, rig and dig.) This week he had two. I...
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Jobs for Recently Kicked Out of Iraq Blackwater Workers

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Blackwater is in deep water. A number of months ago, Iraq denied the protection services company a renewal of their operating license. Thi...

What up, Stu!

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Of all people, I ran into Stu at Circus during the Margot and the Nuclear So and Sos show. Time has been good to him, but obviously his vis...
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Margot and the Nuclear So and Sos in Columbus, OH March 2010

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Margot came into Columbus on Thursday and I was happy. I bought two tickets and conned Dustin into going. We met at Skully's for pre-...
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