Doug Eats: Deluxe Grass Jelly Dessert - What is that which is not solid and not liquid but gives gas?

Last week, the team planned a fun lunch at the local Chinese all you can eat. Sadly, Ann got a fever and I could not join in the fun. Lucky for me, Jenn and Stephanie stopped next door at the Chinese grocery and picked me up some food for me to try out. Seeing as Erik is still dead from the Erik Eats a few months ago, it was my turn to step up.
IMG_6389
Stephanie and Jenn with gifts of food.

Today on Erik Eats Doug Eats... Deluxe Grass Jelly Dessert
IMG_6391

I'm not sure what it says on the can, but I assume that it explains how physics and gravity are both suspended within the confines of the can.
IMG_6393

The top of the can has a lid with a folded up spoon on the inside. F'ing cool!
IMG_6396
IMG_6400
IMG_6401
Transformers! More than meets the eye!
IMG_6403
Bourarachutchchingcunchingchun!! (That is the transforming noise.)
IMG_6405

Jen tests the spoon to see if it works and to remove any germs with her anti-bacterial saliva.
jenn-tests-spoon

The top of the can has instructions on how to open it.
IMG_6399

I follow them very carefully and mind my hand in the process.
IMG_6408

Wait... my teeth are pretty grimy. I'm going to head to my dentist's office and get them cleaned and whitened. I'll be right back.
Doug-teeth-white
Much better!

Here is what opening the can reveals:
IMG_6410

Holy shit! This looks like a collection of every gall stone removed in June of 1972.

We dump some of this on a plate to get a better look at the components.
IMG_6422

We separate into the four food groups: ass, gunk, brown gel and goo
IMG_6425

Instead of throwing this into the trash and running like a little girl down the hall and into the bathroom, I try it.
IMG_6414
IMG_6415
I love Stephanie's reaction in this one.

IMG_6416
IMG_6417

Wow. It is very hard to pallet the combination of solids and gels. There is a slight sweet taste, but only a man who eats sand for lunch could call this dessert.

Doug says...
IMG_6427

I have to call this stuff a choking hazard.

HOLY SHIT! IT'S ERIK! BACK FROM THE DEAD!
IMG_6428

Upon hearing my statement that the Deluxe Grass Jelly Dessert is a choking hazard, Erik wants to do a scientific study. He uses a tool of the trade, a choking detector.
IMG_6440
This Safety 1st device lets the user know if something is a choking hazard. If the item fits in the device, it is a choking hazard. Erik fills it with this faux Newtonian Fluid.
IMG_6431

Down the hatch!
IMG_6432
IMG_6433
IMG_6435
IMG_6436
IMG_6437

Well. Not a choking hazard, but it does work as a great substitute for syrup of ipecac.

Next Week: Seven Days of Erik Eats!!

No comments: