Clorox Brand Dustpan is Dysfunctional

Miss Sally sent me out to get a broom and dustpan. I wandered up and down the broom and dustpan isle for an hour and used a series of tests and scientific studies to determine the best broom and dustpan combination. In the end, I picked the prettiest set.


The broom is sold by Clorox, but made by an Italian company calledMelody. Italians have been picking up the pieces for hundreds of years, so I didn’t think I could go wrong.

In short, this dustpan is wretched. It breaks the very first law of dust collection which I believe is, “Thou shall not impede the path of the dust into thy pan.” The dustpan’s #1 job is to simplify the transition of the dust from floor into the pan collection area. This is usually done with a ramp (fig 1) or inclined plane if you are into simple machines. Innovative Dust Scientist began putting rubber strips on to the edge of dustpans so that the flexible edge would mold to the floor and allow more debris to go up and into the pan.

The biggest problem with any dustpan is that the front edge can keep dirt from entering the pan. The best dustpan in the world would have a one atom thick, flexible edge. But I also think that would make it incredibly sharp and it would slice up the linoleum. Most dustpan manufactures create a flexible edge with a low profile.

Clorox decided to go a different route. I think that their dustpan is so pretty that they do not want it to get dirty, so they created a three tiered, front edge that keeps dirt from getting up and into the pan.


Dirt battles its way over the first edge, only to be met by the second edge. Even if it makes it past that second edge, there is a slope that it must overcome.

What’s really funny is that the backside of the dustpan does have a perfectly smooth ramp. I guess the technology is so secret that they had to hide it on the underside.


Since this product sucks as a dustpan, I thought I might provide some situations where its design would be helpful.

Beaches at Normandy


USA / Mexico Border


Police Stop Sticks

24 comments:

Anonymous said...

Yes! Finally. My fella has this very item and I can attest to the extreme suckage.

Anonymous said...

This is the first non-sucky dust pan I have ever purchased:
http://www.lehmans.com/shopping/product/detailmain.jsp?itemID=292&itemType=PRODUCT&RS=1&keyword=dustpan

Anonymous said...

They do it like that so that you must sweep more. More sweeping leads to shorter broom life span, and hence: increased broom sales. I have no evidence for this.

Mike from NY said...

Actually....The rubber part was installed upside-down. A QC mistake.

Anonymous said...

Just use a paper plate ripped in half cheap and you can throw it away with the dust.

Anonymous said...

Wonderful analysis of this obvious design flaw. Did anyone even test this out before it went to market? I have one of these dustpans and did a Google search for "clorox dustpan design" to see if anyone else had seen this and ended up here. I just wanted to share my disgust.

Compostfreaks.com

elcapito said...

EVERYBODY!!!!
Read what Mike wrote.
Sometimes there is a simple answer to a stupid question.
As far as I know the Italians are good at wine, pizza and dust.

Harold Fowler said...

Hmm, it sure looks cool though thats for sure.

jess
http://www.anonymity.at.tc

Anonymous said...

What happened to the friction constant in the force diagram

Mike G. said...

You also forgot to consider the broom width to dustpan width ratio (ideal would be roughly 4:5)

Anonymous said...

I think that the two edges are there so that when you apply pressure, the two meet together, and form a plane with a very small gap, instead of having a solid piece of plastic (or rubber) . The solid piece of whatever would bend too much to be able to get stuff in, it would end up taking a half-pipe shape. And the third ridge, it keeps stuff from leaving the dustpan, too.

Anonymous said...

anonymous @ 12:49 PM:

you are a fucking faggot ass moron. i hope you drop dead and your parents house bursts into flames. good day.

Anonymous said...

or maybe the rubber part was installed upside down.. makes perfect sense that the 2 tiered thing would keep dust from getting under it..

Anonymous said...

I believe this problem can be solved with precision application of duct tape.

Alan said...

RE: What happened to the friction constant in the force diagram.

This is DUST. What is most important is fluid dynamics. While I do not discount friction, it should be considered a drag force. We need a CFD model to fully analyze this problem.

Al said...

Also makes a great gift!

stephenwhitt said...

First assume all dirt is square.

Alex said...

Also makes a great gift!

inkedblots said...

your new snow scoop!

derik said...

Hmm, it sure looks cool though thats for sure..

John.BB said...

I believe this problem can be solved with precision application of duct tape..

alizee said...

Wonderful analysis of this obvious design flaw. Did anyone even test this out before it went to market? I have one of these dustpans and did a Google search for "clorox dustpan design" to see if anyone else had seen this and ended up here. I just wanted to share my disgust..

Anonymous said...

I really like when people are expressing their opinion and thought. So I like the way you are writing

Anonymous said...

I love the mind of the person that wrote this...you're a cool human mind I can reate to...ty for making me laugh.....